I just came from the estate sale of a local artist Ellen Shannon in Tulsa and I feel conflicted, parts in awe at her collection of artwork, supplies, thousands of books, unique fabrics, ceramics, etc. From her beloginngns she lived an adventurously life, filled with color and textures and self expression. Or at least I think so.
The other hand, I feel like a voyager. Unwelcomed, I suppose? Her home and her things feel like a peak into her soul. Would she have lived that probably not?
Of course I thought of her family, what happened, that none of her four children would claim her belongings. At 72 years old, it still seems so young. Her belongings thoughtfully organized, and well kept up. They meant something to her.
They mean something to us, but not like it would be to her. We will never know the joy, sorrow, or sadness that went into each purpose.
I will never be able to talk with her about her life , but yet her pieces speak to me.
When she passed, her will left everything to her ex husband, he just instructed them to sell it all, in 7 days.
Her wedding dress hanging, right by the kitchen, where she nourished herself, seemed like a haunting reminder of the temporary nature of everything.
From the bites we take out of our favorite meal, to the clothing we wear as a statement of our sense of style, and even the hugs from a love one we experience, are all fleeting.
I felt that inn her home. It was a home, a museum really. I was so grateful to her belongings for sharing with me what it loves like to live a life filled with creativity.
I wish more for her stuff… is 4 dollars too cheap for a necklace she bought on a trip to Indian 30 years ago, or is 10 dollars unpriced for one of her watercoloring that likely took hours or days of effort.
Walking through the home, I thanked her and said that I acknowledge she was here, that she mattered, that her stuff will have new meanings.
I found an old notebook of her’s with a note about love it reads “love is wanting to uncover the potential in people…”
I agree and maybe this love for people can extend to love for our life. Love for our life is uncovering the potential in it and it makes me hope that I can grow old, and wise, and lead a fulfilling life.
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